1. |
Boxers HK
04:23
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Say you want me when you're sober
Is it really that much harder?
I'm holding the three drinks meant for you
Pallbearers from Boxers carrying you
Wake me up when I am sober
Oh that's right you left earlier
Make me watch as you are drowning
When you tell them you're not drowning
If I drink too would I melt in your open arms
Or will some other guy approach me and do me harm?
Our friends don't have much to say about where the two of us stand
So you'll move south and I'll go home with three drinks in my head
I'll wait in your car until you're sober
I'll wait all my life until you're better
Tell me the things that make you feel bad
And why you're scared of becoming your dad
Say you love me when you're sober
Oh that's right you left earlier
Make me watch as you are drowning
Can't you tell I am also drowning?
If I drink too would I feel any closer to you
Or will I collapse underneath my baggage too?
We'll disappear and none of our friends will understand
You'll leave them all and I'll go home with three drinks in my head
The jacket you left in the basement of Boxers smells of wood
From the fires that we lit all around the neighborhood
Our friends don't have much to say about where the two of us stand
So you'll move south and I'll go home with three drinks in my head
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2. |
Aquarius, 12 Years Later
05:23
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Put on headphones to drown out the noise
Unknown thoughts meandering through the Appalachian trails
Under the moon
Red envelopes filled with silence
Reminding me of holes
Made in Wilmington
The sound of a saxophone
A cat in the sun, alone
While you drank by the fire
I thread these thoughts together
Until I'm left with more noise
I waited 'til you could drive in a straight line
What did you even say as we sat in your car?
Your voice went soft, the rum converted into snowdrops in your eyes
You wanted to thank me
I felt like a knight in shining armor
I was a father hen
I was alive again
But I was but another bird of prey
Looking for their ken
All that's never been
Ganymede you were just a child when you were taken
You have so much farther to fly
So fly
My body is open and wide
Beyond the echoes of the lake
Lovely Aquarian eyes
My body curls up warm and tight
Around a soft adjacent shape
As I watch you rise
And out of sight
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3. |
Rise
06:08
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Why did you pull me away from my friends?
Like a father tightly squeezed my hand
Only to disappear
Again and again in the end
Why did he follow me to the bar
When I told him we wouldn't go far?
I was too drunk to hear
Him scream at my face in the end
Rise again
Shine again
Why did they look at me like some prize
Without ever approaching the light?
They brush their hands on me
I don't follow them in the end
You said I was hated by all of your friends
Because I looked too much like them
Stepping between us both
They pulled you away in the end
Rise again
Shine again
Rise again
Shine again
Three drinks is enough to leave me in shambles of unwed emotion
Ten years from now after you have grown thinner you'll show me your children
But you'll still be scared to grow
Uncertain of where it will end
Uncertain of where it will end
I am (or I was?) a cruel imitation
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4. |
Libra On Ice
03:28
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I am (or I was?) a glacier with water trickling down my sides to be imbibed my men, my stream of consciousness. So how have I slaked my own thirst for so long? A queer uncertainty hangs over my breath, invisible. What is a man to me but someone to throw into a singularity until it spits out feelings of gender and jealousy that I can pretend were mine? My body still contains me. My incapable hands clutch at his, wanting to push him in.
Absin beckons fall
The weight of expectation
Collapses young hearts
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5. |
Barracuda
03:36
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I was never a boy
Am I doing this for a boy?
I was never a boy
Am I doing this for a boy?
I was a winner, baby, twice now
Even with one crown
After all we've been through
I finally found you
But we don't know, know, know, know, know
Where to go, go, go, go, go
At Barracuda
We could kiss the cub dancing next to us
Tugging him by the tie he'll melt right into our open arms
And you won't have to go away again
Am I doing this for a boy?
I'm not doing this for a boy
Am I doing this for a boy?
I'm not doing this for a boy
But we don't know, know, know, know, know
Where to go, go, go, go, go
At Fire Island
We could claim our space in the Pines
Or telling them all to fuck off we'll sail away with open arms
At Barracuda
We could kiss the cub dancing next to us
Tugging him by the tie he'll melt right into our open arms
And you won't have to go away again
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6. |
Gemini (Michael)
05:56
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We were an orphan in a storm
Beaten and worn
We were an orphan out of love
Clothed in light above
Is it right to be divided?
In different times
A different smile
You are my beating heart
I am your earthbound soul
You are the name that I have long since abandoned
Is it fine to lay silence
When we are tired
Of hearing others' lies?
I am another part
You are the afterglow
I am the ghost that I see in our reflection
Who was that orphan anyway?
Who will we become today?
My body is a constellation to another home
Removed from men
All we've ever been
(We're not doing this for a boy)
I am (or I will be?)
A glacier stretching across an infinite sea
Rise again
Shine again
The fires lit in the places where they used to stand
Are a beacon for the ones searching for a familiar hand
I'll wait all night until I'm sober
I'll live my life so I'll get better
Show me the days we spent apart
And all the days that have yet to start
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