1. |
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2. |
Elpis
01:04
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3. |
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Coming out to your straight best friend
It doesn't go exactly the way you wanted
My heart is pounding and I'm so embarrassed
'Cause there's more to say but it just won't fit
I fail to explain exactly how I feel
He listens and tells me that it's not my fault
I give him his jacket back as I thaw
But he doesn't know that I'm stuck
Coming out to your new best friend
Tell him you were in love with a man named Zachary
Who left before you even had a chance
To tell him why it's his fault, see
You ask what I did to make him run away
I sigh and hide my face beneath the sheets
I lay there in silence, feeling you breathe
Did you know that I'm still stuck?
December 17th, 2014
Have you noticed that I am all insane
I haven't even talked about the rape
Or anything at all that's meaningful
The stoop is covered in our cigarette butts
Your eyes go along with that whimpering sound
We sit there and argue til the sun comes out
You fall asleep but I'm still stuck
Our smoke is sailing far beyond the ceiling
You say there's nothing wrong with overreacting
You make no promises that you'll be returning
And that blows but at least you're honest
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4. |
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He's by the bathroom window smoking
I'm leaning on the sink and waiting
The sheets are white, the time is right
And he's so so sweet but then he moves his hand
On my chest
Oh, I freeze
And let him run it down my leg
And I know
He's so sweet
But now I'm falling back to the home
Of a lonely man
Who knew I was too young to say, "No! No!"
He asks me where the stiffy went
And I tell him we could kiss again
His muscles are lean his beard scratches me
But could you mind the outlines in my brain
They would come to light at such a tragic show
And, oh! What a doll for it polish your own wicked jewels
How it looks like the kids at your school
And, oh! What a doll for it to clear your number when you looked away
While there would be much left to say
His hand's on my chest
Oh I freeze
And let him run it down my leg
And I know
He's so sweet
But now I'm falling back to the home
Of a lonely man
Who knew I was too young to say no
So once I get up
We can see
If your touch will set me free
And I know
You're so sweet
But this is more than memory
What I need
Is outside the reach of my incapable hands
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5. |
The Waif
01:40
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I have lived here
Under the light of the gilded Ramble falls
I have slept here
In the antiquated Palladion halls
Dancers reeling
Timbres fleeting
Singers weeping
I've stopped bleeding
And in your hesitating arms I gently died
In the last tear I saw a vision of what I had thought would be my redemption
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6. |
The Star
00:46
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7. |
Aquarius
04:03
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Ganymede, your feathers fall forth from the sky
Where I stand naked underneath your cup
Steam escaping from my crowded chest where it stumbles where it hides
Where I found a little glowing sun
My body is narrow and light
In the veil of a snowy gaze
Lovely Aquarian eyes
My body is brittle and fine
In your soft adjacent shape
So watch how I rise
I rise
Does the fire slake my wounded thirst for belonging among men
Rounding in the dark
Ganymede you were just a child when you were taken
Did you think that you'd fly so far?
My body is open and wide
Beyond the echoes of the lake
Lovely Aquarian eyes
My body curls up warm and tight
Around your soft adjacent shape
So watch how I rise
I rise
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8. |
It Started With Brian
03:21
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You were a lovely mess
Like one giant wrinkle
That went in all directions
And I was the very best
At breaking every single rule
Of being a good friend
I put up a lonely wall
That hid all the pieces
Of canyons carving deep into my back and on my arms
Rejected all your drunken calls
About the girl you fucked last night
And whether you were right about the way you missed me
Past that rock I found you almost dead
Oh what a lovely mess
Chest pressed tight against my back you slept
And I could hear the voices telling me of what I am
Your lips are so much warmer than I ever dared to imagine
I spent fifteen years denying that all I ever wanted
Was you on the couch telling me
"I could get used to this."
I could get used to this.
You were a lovely mess
In smiley-faced boxers
Look at how we've grown
And I can finally rest
We couldn't be any closer
In you I found home.
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9. |
Frühlingstraum
01:12
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I dreamt of colorful flowers
Just as they bloom in May
I dreamt of green meadows
And the songs of birds
I dreamt of love requited
Of a beautiful man
Of hearts and kisses
Of joy and bliss
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Kevin G. Chan New York
Soft queen from Queens.
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